I'll start by saying that this post will not go into any detail of my date, however, I hope it will give you an idea as to how I'm feeling now I have finally been on one.

Dating as a transgender female is even more daunting than I ever imagined. I joined a couple of dating sites a few months ago; one LGBT and one mainstream. Profiles were identical, pictures as well. I said I was transgender from the very beginning and was pre-op. Was I prepared for the onslaught that was awaiting me - no. In a nutshell, this is what I encountered: Dick pics galore, threesomes, lonely American soldiers in west Africa, ticking a transgender off of their list, a one night stand and me wanting to 'do' them. I'm trying to get rid of the damn thing, not use it more!

I have so much respect for how much crap females have to put with on dating sites. I've heard many horror stories, but until you experience it for yourself, you can't possibly imagine how bad it is. I had to delete my profiles eventually as there was nobody serious or willing to take me on as I am. I was dejected and resigned to being single for a long time yet.

So, a couple of weeks ago, I got a message asking me on a date. A bit of background to put things in order. Last year, this same person messaged me out of the blue asking for a date. They were a friend of a friend of a friend. They were at a quiz I went to with a couple of friends and via my  friends, they found me via Facebook. You can guess the rest. We chatted a bit and eventually agreed to meet up.

The day came for the date. I was looking forward to it. My first date as me! I started to get myself ready and.........they cancelled on me. 4 hours before. If you read the last post, you know how disappointed I was. It was a rejection. I knew it might happen, but I didn't realise how much it would affect me. My confidence took a hit and my initial reaction was that they'd got cold feet as I am transgender. I did let them know how I felt and did vow never to go on a date with them.

Fast forward a few months. The last post explained the situation behind me going for a date. I was expecting the date to be called off again, so that I wasn't disappointed if it was. I got ready, picked out my outfit, WhatsApp'ed my friends to get their opinion and waited for the cancellation message. It never came. With the time ticking by, I had to get going. A short bus ride and I'd be there.

I arrived at the venue first. That means that I'll have to buy my own drink. D'oh! I looked at the cocktail menu (dutch courage) and picked out a mojito. Hmmm....a lovely mojito. I got  my drink, sat down and waited. And waited. And eventually, they turned up. Thy didn't recognise me at first as I have dark blue hair now (not my natural mousey colour) so a bit of frantic arm waving was needed!

(This next paragraph is classified information as it contains private information).

Before we knew it, three hours had flown by and it was time for us to both go home to our respective beds (we both had to get up at 5am). They escorted me to the bus stop and waited with me until the bus came. We had a little cuddle and a peck on the cheek and I boarded the bus back home. When I got back, there was a message saying I looked beautiful and asking for a second date.

My confidence took a shot in the arm. It went better than I expected. The conversation flowed, I felt at ease, not only with them but with myself. It has given me more optimism when it comes to dating and how I present myself. The fact that I made small talk for three hours is a miracle in itself! It was all positive and I feel better for going as it is out of my comfort zone and I need to push myself out of my comfort zone sometimes. Friends, take note!

A second date is currently being arranged. Just settling on a date. Not next week as I'm moving home. My own flat. I can't wait!!